Feel the love ....

February as we know is the love month and every year we all get bombarded with Valentine's stuff.

Now for me personally Valentine’s Day is the day before my birthday, it was actually the day I was meant to be born. Therefore Valentine's is my pre birthday and my mum always made it like this so I’ve always loved this, so it never has been the thing it is for many people.

For some people it’s a big deal, others really hate it or don’t bother at all as they see it as commercial bullshit and if someone is single or going through a rough time on the love front, it can feel tough.

Here’s the thing: we can’t control the outside and the commercial aspect is fruitful so it's always going to be there.

Obviously, Valentine's has been around a long time I’m just going to pop the Wikipedia link here:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valentine%27s_Day

The key is to make of this day what you want of it, like any of the days that occur throughout the calendar such as Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.

But in the long term make the commitment to feeling the love with yourself a 365 one.

Self love is thrown around like confetti within the self help movements, in my opinion there's things we can do in relation to this but its a personal journey for each person. Whether you're loved deeply or feel unloved and alone, we all need to have a deeply loving relationship with ourselves in a non egotistical way. By appreciating and loving ourselves, being kind to ourselves and meeting ourselves where we are at. Of course we are human, we won’t love ourselves all the time either.

What works for one person may not work for another and it’s important to acknowledge this. In order to feel that love, it simply begins with trying different things and feeling into what feels good for you.

It begins with the simple but huge questions: do I love myself?

Do I appreciate myself?

Am I kind to myself when I fuck up?

How do I see myself ?

How does it feel to be complimented?

Do I believe I deserve love?

When we answer these honestly it gives us a foundation to work from and the truth is many of our patterns go all the way back to when we are younger and the dynamics within our lives.

Therefore, it's a case of unraveling them, and being kind to yourself if you have years of not loving and appreciating yourself. You will need to commit to rewiring this in, which may take a bit of effort and time but the results leave in you a space of feeling the love to yourself, appreciating yourself and seeing yourself in a new light.

If it feels overwhelming at first so start with small things, such as finding one thing you love about yourself.

There will most probably be a shadow of blame of how long you spent hating on yourself, this is the narrative you need to quash and forgive yourself and move forward in order to progress with this journey.

Of course you will slip up and feel yourself slipping into old patterns, but commit to this new trajectory and in time this will become part of you. There’s no set process or time limit and its journey you will go on for the rest of your life, because no matter how much we try we can’t escape from ourselves.

Some self love hacks:

Like I said in the above, rewrite that story and get clear on the key questions.
Affirmations, I find you have to find ones you actually resonate with and believe and these will change over time.
Dance and any form of embodiment practise.
Having good self care, start small if you aren’t used to doing nice things for yourself.
Mirror work, this can feel a lot for some people and isn’t for everyone, but certainly is a powerful practise.
Meditation of course as this reconnects you to yourself.
Journaling, in a way that works for you.
Guided visualisations is a great way to rewire things in.
Gratitude, this is powerful when we start appreciating the little things about ourselves.
Let yourself receive from others.

Here’s the thing, these are just a few suggestions and these will all feel different for everyone. There’s no right way, it’s simply what's the most loving way for you to feel the love.

Get a buddy on board, someone you trust who can hold the space when you need it but also hold the mirror up when you need it, as there's nothing nicer than sharing the love with others.

Remember you don’t need this though as at the core this is about the love for you.

This is a huge topic, so of course this post is basic but see it as a taster to reclaiming the love for yourself.

I hope this is helpful for whenever you read this post.

Happy V day and may we feel that love then, now and always.

Share this blog with anyone that it may help or serve.

All my love

Hannah X

Ps Myself and my friend Emma Mumford have a joint podcast we sometimes do called “The Bullshati podcast” we recorded a Valentine episode. Take a listen here and feel the love with us!

https://play.acast.com/s/the-bullshati-podcast/valentinesday-cupid